Some tamil poetries scribbling

யார் சொன்னார்கள் இரவில் சூரியன் வராது என்று
எங்கள் வீட்டுக்கு வந்தது
ஒளிமயமாகவும் ஒலிமயமாகவும்
தாயாய் , சகோதரியாய்,குழந்தையாய்
சந்தோசமாய் சுற்றியது....இப்போது
செயற்கை ஒளியில் இருக்கிறோம்
இயற்கை ஒளி எபோது வரும் என்று
எங்கள் அன்பு மகளை ஊருக்கு வழி அனுப்பிவிட்டு!!!!!


காதல் ஒருவனை கைப்பிடித்து
மணவறையில் மணம்முடித்து
புகுந்த வீடு வந்தால் பெண்
வந்ததும் கணவனிடம் சொன்னால்
தந்தையாகவும் தாயாகவும் நான் இருக்க
உன்தந்தையும் தாயும் எதற்கு என்று
அவனும் அதையே சொன்னான் அவளிடம்
கோபம்கொண்டு தாயகம் திரும்பினாள்
இங்கு ஆணுக்கு ஒரு நியாயம்
பெண்ணுக்கு ஒரு நியாயம் தான்
பாரத நாட்டில் பெண்ணுக்கு சுதந்திரம் இல்லை
என்று யார் சொன்னார்கள் ?!!



கனவுகள் கண்டிருக்கிறேன்
வானத்து நீலத்தை எடுத்து
அழகான கவிதை ஒன்றுவரைய வேண்டும் என்று
கனவுகள் கண்டிருக்கிறேன்
அற்புதமான கதை ஒன்றை
எழுதவேண்டும் என்று
கனவுகள் கண்டிருக்கிறேன்
வார்த்தைகள் என் நாவில்
விளையாட வேண்டும் என்று
ஒன்றுமே என்னை கேளாமல்
அவர் கொடுத்தார்
அழகான காவியமான என் வாழ்வில்
அற்புதமான கதையாக என் கணவரையும்
அழகிய வார்த்தைகளாக என்
தங்க மகளையும் ....
கனவுகளை விட எனக்கு
நிஜங்கள் சுவையானவையே என்றென்றும்....

என் மடியில் குழந்தையாய்
நீ விழுந்த போது உன்
கள்ளமில்லா சிரிப்பை ரசித்தேன் வியந்தேன்
பின் என் விரல் பிடித்து
நீ மழலை பேசி நடந்த போது
உன் பேச்சினை ரசித்தேன் வியந்தேன்
வளர்ந்த பின் உன் பயன்களை கூறி
நீ அழும்போதும் மீண்டும் போராட
எழும் உன் மனோதிடத்தை
ரசித்தேன் வியந்தேன்....
நான் என்றும் பதிலை நின்றேன்
உன் ஓயாத கேள்விகளுக்கு
உன் கேள்விகளை கேட்டு ரசித்தேன்
இப்போது வளர்ந்து குமரியாய் நிற்கிறாய்
இன்றும் ரசிக்கிறேன் வியக்கிறேன்
உன் மனதிடத்தை உன் ஓயாத உழைப்பை
உன் உதவும் திரத்தை கண்டு
thaayaga அல்ல ஒரு manaviyaaga
இப்போது vazhaiyin padathirku
badhilaai நீ nirkirai naan kelviyaai
ipodhum வியக்கிறேன் எனக்கும் evalavu
azhaiya மலர் எப்படி வந்தது என்று ....

Empty-nest syndrome and me :)

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I have read about "Empty nest syndrome" but never thought it can be true.You have to experience things to know about it.Empty-nest syndrome is the name given to a psychological condition that can affect a woman around the time that one or more of her children leave home.It's not a term you'll find in many medical text books, but it has become a useful phrase for encapsulating the feelings of sadness and loss that many women experience when their children no longer live with them or need day-to-day care.It's most common in autumn, when vast numbers of teenagers have just left home for college or university.It can also happen when a child gets married, because matrimony is a clear signal that Mum is no longer needed in the same way she once was.When my mom used to tell me that she missed and misses me a lot ,I never gave a big thought to it.That's why I am telling that you have to undergo the situation to know about it.when my daughter was born, it was like a bundle of joy,a small angel always with me demanding most of my time.My whole life started revolving around her.It was always my daughter,which held the top in our priority list . slowly my angel also started growing up but it was always me she used to turn up when she had any problems or when she wanted to know something.It was always mom knows the best.I never thought a day will come which may change the way things are being looked at.It was the time she had to enter college.We left her in college hostel.My stomach stated feeling funny.I started feeling bad .Even though I knew that I was leaving her in hostel I never thought it can cause so many feelings inside me.I would say it all started a week before and I even felt like asking my daughter whether I can stay in Chennai and she can always stay with me. I was very proud that my daughter was very bold not to show her tears ,even though I surely know she would have also felt the pain.I was also surprised about myself because that was the first time since she was born ,I was leaving her alone or was it I was separated from her but I was strong enough not to show my emotions. When we got into the car and we came out of the hostel into roads I wept and my husband told ...what is this, its just just an hour travel to chennai from kalpakkam and why are you so sad.You can talk to her over the phone but i knew he was also feeling bad.We came to my parents house .My mom told me it was natural ,I can understand your pain,You will be alright soon.I still remember I could not sleep a wink.I kept turning and tossing and it was my daughter who was in my mind and I was worried whether she will eat her breakfast properly ..etc.You don't need any reason to start worrying.We were to meet her in college after her first day and come back to kalpakkam.I was watching the clock and my mom was telling me that sounderya will be having a great time with her new friends and she is just going to wave her hands.Time seems to go in a slow pace.Now I knew the pain.The syndrome called empty nest too.After I saw my daughter we came to kalpakkam.I could see I was always occupied in her thoughts and it really made me feel lonely and depressed.I calmed myself trying to sort out things.I felt we as parents tend to always think that the children are solely dependent on us.We just fail to notice that they too grow up and they actually despise being told to do things the way we want.then I realised I have to control my emotions.Now that I have taught my daughter the good and bad,I should also allow her to mingle with the society so that she will learn to deal things.If I do not keep my feelings in check, I will always expect her to be near me during her weekend,to keep on reminding her to do this and that which is going to stand in her way of taking decisions.then I thought if I ever want my child to be a better individual I have to grow wise.So I just wrote these things which appeared in a magazine in a paper and read daily whenever I felt like calling her.
When your child leaves home, you'll obviously want to keep in touch with him or her. But don't try and do this excessively.Be sensitive to the fact that your son or daughter is trying to take a big, significant step in life - which isn't actually much to do with you.Your offspring will need your support, but will not want to feel swamped. And the more you cling or show that you're upset, the less likelihood there is of him or her contacting you.Ration your calls to no more than two a week. Also, try texting or using email instead of phoning. You'll be able to put your feelings succinctly without getting too emotional.This form of communication will probably suit your child better, too. It's much easier for a young person to say 'I really miss you' in a message rather than on the phone, when other students might be listening.If your child is having a miserable time at university or college, do resist the impulse to be pleased about this! And don't suggest that he or she gives up and comes home.Plenty of teenagers are very miserable and lonely for a couple of weeks, but they deal with it. And that is a great accomplishment.So be supportive, but don't sort everything for them - and certainly don't try to bring them back home.
Believe me that's what I did and that's what it is even now.My daughter ,now a young lady still my angel turns to me when she is depressed .She always asks me what to do and how to do things,but she is happy we are not those parents who keep a watch always.She decides.After all its her life and she has to decide.Wearing her shoes I just ask myself, will I like my parents telling me this and when it is a NO I don't tell her.I am sure she can never waver and fall into a wrong path as we have taught the goods in life.and she also knows her responsibility.Even without my telling she calls when she goes somewhere.I think children just love you when you have confidence in them.Anyway I cannot say this is the right way to parenting as I maybe right ,may be wrong...no mathematical formulas work here....was just talking my heart about Empty nest.when parents who are ready to send their kids to hostel talk to me about their fears,I always tell them this,the points I had followed.Maybe they think I am crazy .Anyway it worked good for me.

Walking down with nature

Exercise...one word which is not in my dictionary.First my husband told me rather requested that I should try doing breathing exercise ,which helps a lot and a bit of yoga which gives a peaceful start to the day.I am very adamant about these things.You can ask me to stop drinking juice or eating icecream, I can never exercise .My simple excuse was that i will feel tired after exercising.I should confide that I have never tried ,to tell him that tired business.So he just gave in knowing it was an impossible attempt.Then came another method.He said ,you dont have to do these things we can walk just walk.....WALK ME!!!!I go to the temple ,market ,then walk to and fro inside our house .Is that not walking ?I will feel tired and my legs will ache.When do you want me to walk?was my question with a look which would have told my dear husband that he was just trying to move a rock.He said morning walks are refreshing ,good for health.You will also get freed from rigidness of bones and muscles.I just stared at him as if he had asked me to murder someone.Me ,get up in the morning.Oh god thats impossible.I love that part of sleep .My immediate excuse was- dont i have to cook for you...he said you finish your cooking in one hour and whats the problem.No,I wont have the energy to finish the work rest of the day as if i have lots of work to do andI will be tired.You dont want to do somethings excuses just starts flowing into your mind.I dont know about others ,it is like that for me.Pitying him I gave in. I will try and see once.I set my alarm at 5.15 am muttering that its a time to sleep in peace .Morning along with the alarm my husband got up ,trying to wake me.I just opened my eyes and said no wayI am not in this game and fell asleep.He knew its like making me shut up...its very difficult to wake me up too that too for a walk.So unsuccessful he stopped telling me.I dont know what happened but one day when I saw the mist and chillness ,I decided I should walk and enjoy it .So out of the blue I said while going to bed.... I am coming for walk tomorrow.You know what he said ,no I have decided to continue later as its cold and I will catch cold and headache.Then probably he thought why to miss this opportunity,after all people this lazy duck wants to walk...ok if you are keen we can go but I doubt if you will get up.That triggered the whole thing,what I will if I want to.So I got up and ofcourse I walked.Believe me friends,we miss quiet a lot of things in nature.It was calm and cool.The misty morning with sea water so still and clouds turning red .Nature is always in different colors and shades,it is not same sometimes the black clouds engulf the sea,sometimes waves roaring,sometimes still.I even started enjoying the sight of the fishing boats eagerly trying to get a good catch,the newspaper boys chatting among themselves ,the birds qued up near the backwaters leaving me in wonder what for they are waiting and that too so early and it goes on and on.you have to see to enjoy.ofcourse its difficult to wake up but once you fall in tune with it, its easy. Ithink we are really missing beautiful feelings and things around us.Exercise...who told you I am exercising... ME no way...I am just enjoying mother nature.
I read this poem in net
By Giovanna A. Scotti
It is so wonderful that we have nature to explore,I imagine without nature life would be a bore,Watching a caterpillar become a cocoon,Knowing that a butterfly will emerge soon,Seeing tadpoles that become frogs,Finding salamanders under rotted logs,Birds, fish, ants, and squirrels by the ton,Rock crystals that gleam in the high noon sun,Springtime brings baby geese fluffy and adorable,Not being able to see them would be horrible,Leaves full of color falling to the ground,And not as many hummingbirds and butterflies flying around,Now don't you see....Without nature we just wouldn't be!!!!

HIDE AND SEEK

According to me,morning is the time which needs lot of patience and concentration.Not that I cannot finish my work in time but because I always have a fear that I might delay things that may result in my husband going to office late.I was packing my husbands lunch and I heard my husbands voice ..Mangala,there is only one black sock .Where is the other one?Oh God ,not again and I ran over to see if I could trace the lost one.But to my disgust it was not there and I had to give him another pair .So after he left to office I kept wondering,how inanimate things manage to vanish.It is really a wonder than P.C. Sarkar's vanishing act.I could never trace the black socks.Then comes the handkerchiefs.You buy a dozen but it just vanishes .I always have a doubt if my husband loses it in office.Sometimes when I wash I retrieve them from his pant pockets.Whenever it is a pair I invariably find that it gets divorced and I am always left with one sock,one glove......my thought process comes to an end with the telephone ring.Its my father.He wants me to note down a number .I look around and find I have the note pad but the pen??? I look in the pen stand.Where has it gone ?I search for the pencil which I remember seeing even the day before.But that too is missing .I remember taking it to solve sudoku .Probably left it in the dining table ,but it wasn't there .Where in heavens do these things disappear?The other day when I had to note down an address,I was happy to get the pen but my notebook was missing.Here again,I think they also do have an argument among themselves and vanish.Sometimes I have realised that even if the pen is there it wont write.I don't know the experience of others but for me when we start somewhere and think of locking the suitcase i am always faced with a problem.I have a tin box with many locks and keys but none suits.aha I buy a new one and it is always that either the key is lost or lock is lost.so I am just surprised by the way these things lose their partner and stay single.They just runaway into the wonderland to share Alice's adventures or to have tea with mad hatter perhaps.Now after saving this article just taking the thumb drive I realise , oh my god not again ,its lid missing perhaps gone to tea.

Introspection

I was chatting with my friend and he told me that he was making a list about what he likes.I told him it was very simple and why at all someone should list them.He said he wanted to list 50 but could list only 25.He said that I can also try.Its self introspection.This word really hooked me.It really made me wonder what that word really meant.English is a language where you have nice synonyms.So I went about browsing the word introspection....I came across real interesting facts and meanings...Introspection is the self-observation and reporting of conscious inner thoughts, desires and sensations. It is a conscious mental and usually purposive process relying on thinking, reasoning, and examining one's own thoughts, feelings, and, in more spiritual cases, one's soul. It can also be called contemplation of one's self, and is contrasted with extrospection, the observation of things external to one's self. Introspection may be used synonymously with self-reflection and used in a similar way.
While I was browsing I came across an interesting finding that Henri Poincare - the great French Scientist who was the Grand-Father of Chaos Theory and co-discoverer of Special Relativity Theory - was also interested in the way his own mind worked. He gave a talk about his observations in 1908 at the Institute of General Psychology in Paris. He clearly linked his way of thinking to how he made his scientifical discoveries.
His mental organization was not only interesting to him but also to Toulouse, a psychologist of the Psychology Laboratory of the School of Higher Studies in Paris. Toulouse wrote a book called Henri Poincaré which was published in 1910. Toulouse noted that Poincaré never spent a long time on a problem since he believed that the subconscious would continue working on the problem while he worked on another problem.(wow this is a lovely theory)
Poincare was originally a mathematician - he performed better in mathematics than all the other students at the prestigious Ecole Polytechnique - but he believed that logic was just a way to structure ideas not to make scientific discoveries. He strongly opposed the philosophical views of Bertrand Russell when he said in his book Science and Hypothesis:
"For a superficial observer, scientific truth is beyond the possibility of doubt; the logic of science is infallible..."
For Henri Poincaré, the way the Real World is working cannot be deduced just from Logics. For him, Mathematics is not Science, it's just an abstraction tool.
Unfortunately today, Bertrand Russell's point of view seems to dominate for today many people do implicitly consider mathematical theorems as Truth in Reality. Since his viewpoint was lost against Bertrand Russell's, it is not astonishing that Shewhart and Deming claimed they have much difficulty to teach their philosophy to the Americans because they said the US Engineers did think Quality Control was just about doing Mathematics whereas Probability was only a mathematical tool inside their theory. Their theory was not just about statistical formulas - these latters were already invented centuries ago - but about how NOT to apply them !I wish all people would do their own introspection. By doing this they may open their mind to true knowledge for information is not knowledge: it must be processed like a raw material. As we are overloaded by informations in our modern world, this process is all the more necessary.
Coming back to the discussion .....when he told me I was least interested I felt it was waste of time but after my extensive browsing,I decided to try it out and I sat down to prepare a list...it real was very interesting...I started thinking and started living my likes too.....why don't you people try .After reading this I know you sure will.I should really thank my friend for bringing the word SELF INTROSPECTION into my mind........ :)

WOMEN AND FREEDOM

The status of women in the Indian society has changed from time to time ; the position of women in a society is considered as an index to the standard of the social organization .We can divide the past [history] in to three phases to analyse the status of women. They are: ancient India , Medieval India and Modern India.
In ancient India, women enjoyed equal status with man in all fields of life; she was imparted the same education like man. Many Hindu religious books like Vedas, Upanishads, Ramayana, Mahabharata have mentioned the names of several women who were great scholars, poets, philosophers of the time. The wife was 'Ardhangini' which means she is half of her husband. An unmarried man was considered to be an incomplete man. All religious ceremonies were to be performed by the husband along with his wife. This shows the importance given to the women in ancient period.
But in the Medieval period, the status of women went down considerably. She was considered to be inferior to man. Many historians have called this age as the 'dark age'. Her position became very miserable. Decline in the status of women in Indian society began with the Moghul era in India: customs of purdah , sati, child marriage & restrictions on widow marriage were prevalent.
The position of women in modern India has changed considerably. Her position in modern Indian society is equal to that of men, socially, economically, educationally, politically & legally. Her sufferings from Sati, Child marriage, Institution of Temple prostitution are slowly becoming extinct.
Now, she has the right to receive education, inherit & own property, participate in public life & political life of the nation. She has become economically independent. She can seek employment anywhere and does not remain a domestic slave anymore. So, she is certainly enjoying equal status with man in all respect.
In spite of all this, I read and see people still talking about the liberation of women. what is freedom? who has to give women freedom? we talked about freedom for India only when we were under the control of British.Freedom has always been there, but many a time women tend to be rivals to other women. Let us take the case of the dowry evil. Now with education and awareness, a girl can always say that she wont marry a person who demands dowry. Here again mostly it’s the females who are behind the demand.Even assuming a man demands ,if all women join together it can never happen.If everyone stands up against dowry there wont be any harassment for dowry in our society.Then comes the female infanticide.If the ladies are strong enough and are bold to defend there wont be any such infanticide. My father used to say 'girls are Lakshmis but one should be blessed with a boy to do the last rites for the parents' and my contention was the same always.After one dies he is not going to be aware of anything that happens in the world. Then,why should someone be concerned about the rites to be perfomed after his death. Its only the good deeds one does will be of any help rather than the gender of his heirs. Then comes the craze for jewellery! I was really pained to see that jewels or sarees are the centre piecec of conversation even among elite women. I have never seen them discussing any general topics(most of the women folk) .I am really astonished by the way these women fall in love with the jewels.They just keep piling up jewels. Its only a heart of gold that’s needed to run a happy, loving and peaceful home which seems to be lacking these days. Nowadays people think that adjusting and making compromises is wrong because that is considered an act of slavery. By no means intolerance is a symbol of freedom. Of course there are cases where girls are denied education or not allowed to express their views…but personally I feel that we can change the mentality of those people if the educated ones act with responsibility. My cousin in Hyderabad thinks that attending or being a member of a Lady's club is something to do with her status. When I asked her what she does there, she said that they discuss the problems in the society in genral. But what is the use of simply discussing the problems without addressing any. If as a team you are able to educate or inculcate awareness in people who don’t have them then its an achievement. I am ofthe opinion that they merely go to exhibit their new sarees and diamond studs…as Huxley puts it" painted harridans with artificial smiles.". My opinion ... its only in the hands of women to use the freedom we already have instead of waiting for reservations . We have to bring up our children to be independent but loving ,caring and responsible individuals. It is in the hands of women a house is made which in turn is going to build a good nation. As Tamil poet Subramaniya Bharathi sings


உலக வாழ்க்கையின் நுட்பங்கள் தேரவும்,
ஓது பற்பல நூல்வகை கற்கவும்,
இலகு சீருடை நாற்றிசை நாடுகள்
யாவுஞ் சென்று புதுமை கொணர்ந்திங்கே
திலக வாணுத லார்நங்கள் பாரத
தேசமோங்க உழைத்திடல் வெண்டுமாம்;
விலகி வீட்டிலோர் பொந்தில் வளர்வதை
வீரப் பெண்கள் விரைவில் ஒழிப்பாராம்.

சாத்தி ரங்கள் பலபல கற்பாராம்;
சவுரி யங்கள் பலபல செய்வராம்;
மூத்த பொய்ம்மைகள் யாவும் அழிப்பராம்;
மூடக் கட்டுக்கள் யாவுந் தகர்ப்பராம்;
காத்து மானிடர் செய்கை யனைத்தையும்
கடவு ளர்க்கினி தாகச் சமைப்பராம்;
ஏத்தி ஆண்மக்கள் போற்றிட வாழ்வராம்;
இளைய நங்கையின் எண்ணங்கள் கேட்டீரோ!

WOMEN AND DIRECTIONS

I was a reading an article on women and directions. It went on to say that women were very poor in finding directions and they easily get lost unlike men. Men always have a mental map. When asked directions they always reply ….go straight 25 mts and turn right, whereas women tend to say go straight…there will be a bakery, then shoe store and turn you can see a hotel etc.It reminded me of an incidence that took place some years ago. I was very poor in finding places and even if I had visited the place many times I was always puzzled whenever I was asked to take a bus as I always ended up taking the bus that traveled away from the place I had to reach and it was my husband who always had a nice entertainment and who would always comment that he was very surprised by my inability to find the direction. Actually I really started wondering if something was wrong with my reasoning, logics and my IQ (which I know very well is very less).I was really relieved when we visited my husbands cousin in Mumbai .When she was asked about some place she was baffled (she had been living there right from her birth) and her husband commented that she was very poor in finding places and always went the opposite direction. So I was very happy that I was not alone. Later I came to know many ladies had this problem (men have problem in identifying colors so…) when we were in Germany I always knew from the map which station came next and got down if it wasn’t and got the other side train. I always ended up that way. It was only once or twice that I had traveled in the right direction.
My husband had to go on an official trip to Kiel in Germany and we went with him. There was a beach nearby and we planned to take my daughter there .After our breakfast we started and we heard from his friend that it was only half an hour walk .So we started to walk .I just followed him with my daughter carrying a lot of things to make castle in the sand. We walked, walked and wallllllllked ………but not a trace of water. Another 40 mins nothing. I told my husband that I was very tired and I really doubted if we were moving in the right direction. He just stared at me ….”Of all people u talking about directions kind of look “and told me that he had checked the map. Next thing that was surprising was only few people were walking. Then at last we came to the dead end…I mean dead end truly…it was a graveyard .so after an hour walk we reached this graveyard. I was really wild on thinking that we had to walk another hour to go back .but I was very happy that even my husband got lost getting wrong direction. So whenever he commented I was ready…..” Even you got it wrong. You took us to a graveyard! Nice place to take us”.Eventhough we laughed after reaching home the whole stretch back home was full of arguments. Now when I went to Singapore I found that my daughter was also bad in directions. She always boarded the wrong train and switched direction in the next station….The article finally went to say that women were slower and lack the sense of direction. So at least now I am happy it wasn’t my fault that I always got places wrong.